Great Mouse Massacre of 2008 (Part 2)

Great Mouse Massacre of 2008 Field Report:

While we've seen some surprising setbacks, we've also made some decent progress in our fight against the mouse scourge.

It turns out that mice have an uncanny, if not supernatural, ability to pick hair-trigger trap mechanisms perfectly clean of peanut butter without springing them. At least 3/4 of the time, anyway. Of our 8 traps, 6 were licked absolutely clean -- even the one whose sensitivity was so high it took almost 5 attempts to set it properly without losing a finger. (Note to self: mice must give horrible blow jobs.)

But 2 mice weren't so lucky. I guess it's a crap shoot for them ... you lick, you live. You lick, you die. Life lesson there, somewhere, I'm sure.

The humane traps are apparently a joke to the mice. The mice laugh at them, if they bother to pay them any mind whatsoever.

Time for us to up our odds. We will now switch up the game. The survivors, happily stuffed full of peanut butter and swaggering cockily with the success of last night's foray, will likely be somewhat more complacent in their eating habits. For Round 2, we will upgrade the trap bait to cheese actually wedged onto the trigger mechanism, so it is actually impossible to remove it without setting off the trap.

For now, it's off to the mouse morgue (e.g. the back yard) for last night's two victims. Morale is guardedly high amongst the troops, as the Commander-In-Chief reconsiders strategy.